and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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