How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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