We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
