So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
