never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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