Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
