i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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