may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Randomize