why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
