do herpes really smell.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
