David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Randomize
