So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I'm sobbing to NWA
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
