I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
