Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
