i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize