she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
