Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Can you bring me the toilet please
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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