im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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