You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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