Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
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