Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
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