Dual....:-)
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize