So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
