so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Randomize
