We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Randomize
