yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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