So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
