I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
