so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
where am i from again
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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