I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize