i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
