i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Randomize
