Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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