the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Randomize