I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
