You're my little dorito
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
