What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
That was before I lit my hair on fire
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