hotel room ftw
I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
someone threw a dead crab at me
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
