I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
