Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
