I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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