someone get that fucking seahorse.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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