Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Randomize
