Nicole vs. Life
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize