I cockslap morals
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I supernannyed him into submission
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize