We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
