so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize