People in love make me want to vomit
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
