The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
