shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
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