I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Randomize
